Tom Ford on what ever man should do

In a recent article on Queerty Tom Ford is quoted as saying, “All men should be f*cked. “I think it would help them understand women,” he argues. “It’s such a vulnerable position to be in, and it’s such a passive position to be in. And there’s such an invasion, in a way, that even if it’s consensual, it’s just very personal. And I think there’s a psyche that happens because of it that makes you understand and appreciate what women go through their whole life, because it’s not just sexual, it’s a complete setup of the way the world works, that one sex has the ability to literally—and is expected to and is wanted to—but also there’s an invasion. And I think that that’s something most men do not understand at all.”
I beg to differ. I agree with him completely on every man being fucked, but I don’t advocate it because it got me to understand what a woman goes through. When I got fucked the first time and all the other times after women were the farthest thing from my mind. Being fucked in the most intimate form of male to male sexual contact. Perhaps Tom has never met some of my friends because we believe getting fucked in far from passive. Bring fucked well is an art and bottoms call the shots. I have a 42 year old son and sexually I’m versatile but when I’m a bottom I set the tone and the range of what’s going to happen.
Ford’s analysis reeks of what I call post-Catholic attitudes where men shift the blame to hide their discomfort with sex that’s been drilled into them by the church. Men should enjoy men sexually and what they should concentrate on when they ar having sex is how much pleasure they are giving their partner and how much they are enjoying their partner’s attention. I can’t think of a better way to wilt a boner than to being up women. Thoughts of women do not belong in gay men’s bedrooms; I frown on movie posters with Marilyn or Katherine or Bette in them unless you’re a drag queen. Gay sex is a privileged I hate to see if wasted by throwing women’s burden into the mix.


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